Develop Alpha Male Personality - Alpha Male Nation
Alpha male is a term taken from the hierarchy of animal species that live in groups and have a predominant leader. The most common example is the alpha dog exercising dominancy over the pack, you can see this behavior at a kennel or even in a dog park. The dominated members of the pack are identified as beta and if the alpha male is missing from the pack they will let themselves dominated even by alpha personality females present in the pack. The alpha male theory extended to human personalities and it is often mentioned even if many will not know much about the subject. We will try to shed a little light today and present to you the features characteristic to alpha males.
The most common thing that comes to mind when talking about alpha males is their tendency of success with women. Alpha male type is identified as an attractive, intelligent, physically fit, and can have a relatively high socio-economic status or it is on an ascending path. These features can be easily observed in some social groups, such as those of male teenagers in general high school. The alpha (or group of alpha males) are the cutest and most popular guys, with athletic bodies, sometimes athletes, while beta males’ guys are less confident around girls and have less to do with “manly” activities.
Beta males are considered usually less attractive by girls. In relationships with the opposite sex they have problems when trying to start a physical relationship and often they are relegated to friend roles. Not all attractive males are mandatory the Alpha type though alpha males exhibit a greater degree of male traits or “macho” features. Many good looking males are essentially beta when comes to involvement in social life.
When we consider workplace relations, alpha males are born leaders, full of confidence in themselves. This feature can be interpreted as an attempt, more or less unconscious, of The Alpha male to maintain its position of being the leader. Being the one with most sales in a company, to be the fastest worker or to be the most aggressive boss, represent attitudes or activities that can keep you on top; also, alpha male has a tendency to respond aggressively to any attempt by others to put him in the shade or subdue. Alpha males not allow other people with alpha personality in their group of friends, feeling the danger of domination.
The Alpha dog is continually tested vis-a-vis its dominant position and it is forced to engage in bloody fights with rivals in the group to maintain its position as number one. In human relationships, the alpha male does not need usually to resort to fighting, they most often resort to aggressive language, irony and a defiant attitude and arrogance to keep its leading position. As a leader for those in the group the alpha male has a protective attitude. They also develop and refine their social skills. The Alpha males are people with very good skills in communication, developing persuasion techniques, with great success in the applicability of emotional intelligence.
Although business leaders can prove excellent when possess characteristics of an alpha male, at the workplace these traits may prove not to be very positive because it often creates conflicts with superiors, keeping with pride their arrogant air, thus hindering their chances of promotion. When he reached a leadership position, the alpha male personality sometimes involves exaggerated desire to be designated “best”.
Alpha male behavior concerns the need for security of women. Women fall prey to the individual that seems to be a charming and powerful man. He seems to know what he wants from life and where it is going. He is willing to do whatever is necessary to get what he wants. Most times though, a long term loving relationship is not part of the plans of alpha personalities. The alpha personality has a natural tendency to put their needs before any other thing. If you have not seen before the alpha male behavior in animal kingdom, I invite you to search the internet, we are sure you will find some interesting specimens.
Although they seem to be attractive candidates for the long term relationship, often turns out to be a bad choice. The alpha man will spend money to show he has power (financial in this case), but this will not compensate for the lack of attention, affection and understanding that the partner needs. The feeling of safety that can experienced in a relationship with an alpha male unfortunately tends to disappear with time. Even if you start experimenting insecurity, due to his charm it is hard to leave behind the relationship. Being alpha is not good or bad, it is just how things are. We can measure on a scale from 1-10 how much alpha is someone. If they are a 1 or a 10, they are probably not good material for a long-term relationship.
Here are some common traits of the alpha male personality:
- Time pressure: The Alpha male has places to go, people to see. It does not have 3 hours for phone calls. He has no time to wait for a woman more than 15 minutes when she is late. He has no more than a minute for her to speak before going back to someone else he has on hold.
- First and foremost, he cares about himself: That should not be confused with selfishness or self-centered. It just means that Alfa male life and fun come first. If he does not act to secure its own satisfaction in life, he feels miserable.
- He creates his own reality: The Alpha male cannot be dependent on anyone to make life fun, so has to go and do it bit himself. He creates a bubble of happiness, fun and good spirit around him, so when he meets a new person he is confident it will be interesting just by the aura of power that he stems.
- He uses cleverness first, then muscles: A true Alpha knows that today we do not have to fight and hunt for survival in the way our ancestors once did. Now we have the luxury to create a new type of dominant man who does not have to physically dominate enemies. He knows that using his smarts and instincts is the easiest way.
- He does not need approval from others: The Alpha male personality knows that his own way in life was created for him and he knows that once he has defined his ethics, their own rules of conduct and code of honor’s, his trust has already been established. What other people think this is secondary? No one else needs to put a stamp of approval for the way that he chose to live.
- It Is gentle and energetic: The Alpha male personality knows how to rein in emotions for a greater good. He knows he must not be tough all the time, and those people who throw their weight around are usually the least confident. (There’s a saying: an empty barrel makes the most noise.)
- It is confident about what he wants: The Alpha male knows what he wants from life and actively pursues his goal. He establishes specific goals and plans to achieve them. And he knows how to take decisions quickly.
- Understand the role of risk in life: The Alpha male is aware that life is most unfortunate when ends in regret of the things undone. He knows and understands it – “Dreams of youth are the regrets of maturity. “. He knows that life is a great adventure – or nothing.
- He does not bet more than he can afford to lose: The Alpha male does not risk more than they can afford to lose, and understand when caution is needed for balance. They understand risk and reward, and how to evaluate them.
- He forgives his failures: He knows that the only ones who not fail are those who never try. Failure is part of life. Hurry up and fail to get success quicker is his motto.
- He grows every day: Alfa man knows that the only way they can stay on top of the evolutionary pyramid is to learn and grow. Those who do not grow die. He reads books and literature every day. He sets achievable goals and focus their drive and ambition toward getting them. There is enough time to be soft and relaxed when he’s dead. Life is very short, and he has a lot to accomplish here.
- The Alpha male knows women are a secondary objective, never a main purpose: Women and sex are an important but not central in the lives of The Alpha male. Women will be secondary benefit of a life that is lived to the fullest and navigated with confidence.
- The Alpha male controls his passions and demons: Alpha man knows what are his strengths and weaknesses in life, and uses this knowledge to achieve progress and success. His hobbies make him advance with determination, and knows the value of balance in his activities. He also knows his vulnerabilities, and cultivates throughout the self-discipline to not let them get the best of him.
- The Alpha male has a well-developed sense of humor: Alfa man knows that nothing in life is so serious, and knows how to laugh at themselves, as well as the rest of the world. Makes others laugh and feel good about themselves.
- He acknowledges that time is the most valuable thing: Even more than money, time is priceless. As the saying goes, you cannot take it with you, and you do not want to wake up at the end of the life chasing riches and not have the time to enjoy them. No one on the death bed wishes to have spent more time at the office. Time is all you have to consume. Never let yourself “kill time”. That’s actually suicide.
- He Is mature and confident enough to leave their ego aside: The Alpha know that ego is only a figment of imagination. When they make it a priority to defend the “image” they will inevitably fall prey to disappointment influenced by pride. Only insecure people need to protect the ego on the expense of learning and growth.
- The Alpha male focuses on long-term vision rather than on achieving short goals: boys have a penchant for looking only ahead when it comes to some attractions in life, such as money and women. He knows when to delay gratification in a way that will serve his purposes.
- The Alpha male is not in a narcissistic and arrogant, his purpose in life is not to make history in psychiatry statistics, but to be in the statistics of history. Which says that is no matter how many times you fall but how many times you get up. The awe of the grandeur is not only on his plans, but also in the discipline and effort you submit on this road. So the Alpha male works. Not to buy the woman’s or riches in his life, but confidence.
- The Alpha male does not look after women ticked on the check-list. He evolved much in puberty and is happy that that phase went away. He seeks a partner with which to conquer the world, whatever looms in the horizon. He does not let himself live in promiscuity, but knows everything there is to know, and chooses his own way. Knowing the sex soon reaches the limit, the answer is the same every time: more than that, this is not! The Alpha male will prefer evolution on the vertical and not on the horizontal.
- The Alpha male will feel a god, but not in asking others to have faith, but in showing that things like miracles are out there, being himself the change that he wants in a woman, he is stable, honest, vulnerable and for all these still brave. His divine attributes are measured in the courage to be human. Meaning sometimes with overwhelming feelings and emotions.
- The Alpha male listen and observe. What he does not say is often more precious than his words. And his favorite drug is empathy, because he does not lose track of himself if put in others shoes, but rather increases its wealth. When she complains about life and the world, he knows it’s not a criticism of him and that all she needs is a hug. The Alpha male embraces. A lot – because he is a problem solver and this is the only solution.
- The Alpha male is in danger of divine if he encounters an alpha female – does not feel in any way neutered or threatened but the opportunist he is says, I can become omega! He plans and conspires with her and he is not running away to his brothers because he feels damaged, they will send him back anyway. You really become a master only together with an alpha female.
- The Alpha male take risks. Including the risk of falling in love. Because he knows what validate his real strength is when there is a matching opponent. He did not grow his self-validation by mediocre successes but by the disintegration of enemy number one: fear. So he will choose to love.
- The Alpha male does not think women should only be loved and not understood. He understands her because he is willing to accept the differences, so that’s willing to step out of his comfort zone to give her what she needs. It is very logical what he does, put a little effort for a big result. Because he knows that justice is a concept that we are negotiating jointly, it is not in anyone’s hand, but in theirs together.
- The Alpha male does not defend the ego. But he sculpts it, not feeling criticized and confronted but willing to understand what others think, those who appreciates himself. He is open to learn, evolve and not be arrogant in an intellectual laziness. So the Alpha male reads.
- The Alpha male dominates. Subtle. Even when on his knees, because vulnerability is a lethal weapon that destroys all pride. His dominance comes from accepting the feelings and emotions that society has taught him to suppress. He does not seem what it is not, but it is what it is. Assumed, congruent, and up and down but mostly stable. Stability comes from his vision. Because…
- The Alpha male is a visionary. No plagiarism or fraudulent stories of others or from the movies, he has a vision. Who he is, where he comes from and where he is going. About things that matter and things that do not matter. Do not try to sell any oversized future but assumes the limit of his horizon with integrity.
- The Alpha male is attracted to women stronger than him. Because they know that her power is not actually greater, but is in an inaccessible area as a man. He quickly learns from her through a supreme act of faith – logic and reason is indulging in rehab on his own signature. And he keeps her near him because a strong woman will continue to grow, so one part of destination is learning. Sex can be sensational in this case, because each time, although they are the same, there is another man making love to another woman. Because they do not relate only to each other but look together in the same direction.
- The Alpha male knows what “delayed gratification”. No, it is an exercise of the Kama Sutra, but it’s a concept pertaining to the psychology of success: knowing how to tolerate temporary frustration for a greater pleasure in the end. This is the only way he will achieve his goals, resisting the urge to win. That means discipline and control the instincts, the mistrust and occasional syncope knowing that in the end there is a prize to be had. The man resists the temptation to become beta, because he knows that being beta is even harder!
The term “alpha personality” was first used in the 50s by a cardiologist. He had made a link between increased risk of heart attack and patient personalities, concluding that the impulsive and always stressed were more prone to such a problem. Although alpha personality theory had been proposed in various medical journals of the time, it was popularized by the book of Dr. Ray H. Rosenman that turned into a bestseller. Since then, people very competitive and impulsive are referred to as “alpha” or “type A”.
Although we often use the A/B typology, it has many nuances and gray areas. You cannot just be type A or type B, but rather to have certain predispositions in both directions or more in one. Very rare are the cases that are fully in a single category. For example, you have an inclination towards alpha personality if you’re more of a competitive and ambitious nature, easily irritable when there are obstacles in your way.
If you have an alpha personality, chances are you are financially successful and have a tremendous career, but with a fairly high cost, given that it will not be easy to start a family. Although you have these predispositions, you can always change your perspective you try and try a different life, it is in your power.
I do not have a scale to measure how alpha is someone but if you spotted an alpha male, before entering into a long-term relationship you should find the answers to these questions:
- What are his core values in the long term?
- Will he sacrifice his needs for yours?
- Does he want to be a good husband?
- Does he want to be a good father?
If you are not satisfied by the answers, ask yourself what drew you to that person. Learn your lesson and move on.
If you have an alpha personality and this article has made you think, I invite you to reflect on the following issues:
- What part in you makes you feel the need to dominate?
- How is it that that it’s hard to see other as equals with you?
- What are your values? Are they truly yours?
Being alpha has both positive and negative sides. The balance between the two is desirable.